Unless you’ve gone through and are aware of spiritual battles, it’s very hard to figure out when they are happening to you. It’s been a long time since I’ve been strong enough in my faith and practicing it consistently . . . and it’s been noticed. As my faith and my practicing of the faith has increased the more I’ve noticed that I’ve been having more and more episodes of moodiness, sadness or outright depression. I may not have noticed the correlation, if I didn’t read “Wild at Heart” courtesy of a Mz. A. The enemy can work in subtle whispers or outright barrages and I can feel myself being targeted. Thank God for His strength and power, He has come through for me time and time again and this morning was no different.

My mom bought me Christian Prayer and I’ve been meaning to use it for the last week but I kept getting tired or distracted. This morning when I woke up i was in a funk and just decided to really make an effort and open the book and do the morning prayer. Once I finished it (after using about 10 minutes getting familiar with the book layout) I felt immediately better. I know I’ll continue to struggle at times but I must never forget the strength that Lord provides me in those times and that I can always count on Him for all things. Thank you Lord for saving me, thank you Lord for being there for me.

Sometimes the best way to cope is to just breathe . . . I forget that sometimes. Regardless of stress, fear, pain, whatever sometimes all you have to do is step back, take a deep breathe then continue with a clearer head and heart.

Just when you think you’re really starting to get past something, it gives you a gut punch when you least expect it. As some of my friends know, I’ve been fighting depression and anxiety courtesy of my divorce for the last 7 months. For the most part, I’ve been able to keep all the bad stuff at bay and be able to deal with it in a healthy manner, but there are still days when it’s just a bit much. When it does just get to you and you just feel so tired and rundown. Just have to fight it off and pray, but at the same time I have to believe in my prayers as well as myself. I have to realize that I am strong enough to overcome anything and everything. I guess I was thrown off by today because I had such a good long weekend, between camp and hanging out yesterday, I was feeling great. Just have to keep fighting, and probably get more sleep.